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| | Home | Coaching | Products | Retreats | Programs | Newsletters | | Resources | FAQ | Testimonials | About Helen | Contact Helen | Copyright © 2005 - 2008 Better Than Ever Coaching. All rights reserved. Address: P.O. Box 391, Brewster, MA 02631 Telephone: (508) 896-5779 Click here to Contact Helen |
Newsletters - February 2007
| Better Than Ever Coaching |
*************************************************************
What Could Be Better?
Written by Helen F. Kosinski, ACC - Professional Coach
February 2007: Volume 2, Issue 2 / ISSN # 1935-4827
*************************************************************
This Month: A Quarter for Your Thoughts
- Feature Article
- What’s Next for You?
- Resources
- Reader’s Corner
*************************************************************
Hi,
I’ve often wondered what animals think about. I’ll see my dog,
Makena, sitting in the living room and wonder if she’s thinking
about when she’ll get her dinner or when she’s going to get to
go for a walk… Or, I’ll see Hana, my female cat, curled up
comfy and cozy, except her tail is twitching…is she thinking
about how she’s going to get back at Kona, her brother?
What do you spend most of your time thinking about? Today’s
feature article focuses on the importance of thinking about what
you really want to invite into your life. Your thoughts spell
out your wishes…so, as the old saying goes "Be careful what you
wish for", or maybe it’s more accurate to say, "Choose your
thoughts wisely".
I hope all of your thoughts bring you closer to your Better Than
Ever Life!
Have a wonderful month!
All my best,
Helen
P.S. Have you heard the hubbub about **The Secret**? This DVD
was released almost a year ago (March 2006) and since that time,
more and more people are learning **The Secret**. As a matter
of fact, Oprah has had two show in February about **The
Secret**…here are the links to the write-ups about these shows:
http://www2.oprah.com/tows/pastshows/200702/tows_past_20070208.
jhtml and http://www2.oprah.
com/spiritself/slide/20070216/ss_20070216_284_101.jhtml
So…what’s **The Secret**? Basically, it boils down to the fact
that each one of us has the ability to create the life that we
have always wanted…and your thoughts play a huge role in that
process. Check it out…http://www.thesecret.tv.
*************************************************************
Feature Article: A Quarter for Your Thoughts
*************************************************************
Here’s a riddle for you…
I can make you rise or fall.
I can work for you, I can work against you.
I can make you a success or a failure;
I control the way you feel, the way you act;
I can make you laugh, I can make you love.
I can make your heart sing with joy and excitement, or
I can make you sad and dejected;
I can make you sick,
I can make you feel like you're shackled and heavy
and bound, or
I can make you feel like a prism's hue, bright and dancing
and beautiful,
I can never be removed, only replaced.
Who am I?
What am I?
I am thought.
- Author Unknown
It’s amazing to me that a simple thought could potentially have
such a big impact. And, if that’s not enough to make an
impression on you, add the fact that each one of us has
thousands and thousands of thoughts in any given day.
A few years ago, I remember participating in a conversation with
two colleagues who were discussing the fact that they were
getting better at not beating themselves up with their thoughts.
They were saying how difficult it was for them to be kind to
themselves when they would do or say something that they felt
wasn’t the correct thing to do or say. Does this happen to you?
Are you even aware that you do it? Since that conversation,
I’ve become much more aware of my internal thoughts and what I
say to myself. I catch myself thinking things like ‘WHY did you
do THAT?’ or ‘Nice job, that report took forever, but it’s
finally done!’ or ‘I can’t believe I just said that to him…’ or
‘Wow, you got all that done today…good for you!’.
What are you thinking about? Do your thoughts focus on things
that are:
Whatever you’re thinking about can have an extremely powerful
impact on your life. So…if you’re regularly telling
yourself positive uplifting and encouraging things, then you’re
probably pretty happy with the way your life is progressing.
However, what if you’re constantly telling yourself that you’re
doing things incorrectly, or that you’re not good enough, or
that you’re stupid? What impact do you think that’s going to
have on your self-esteem, and ultimately, on your life?
What can you do if you discover that your thoughts aren’t as
positive as you’d like them to be? Here are three ideas that
may help chase those negative unproductive thoughts away:
1. A Quarter for Your Thoughts
Each time that you recognize that you’re having a negative
thought, stop and take a quick second to acknowledge this
thought. Then, replace it with a more positive thought.
For example, if you just said something in a meeting that you
wished you hadn’t, instead of thinking, "I’m so stupid! Why did
I just say that? He was being so nasty with his comments, I
just had to respond, but I can’t believe that I said THAT… Now
there’s no way that I’ll get that promotion."
Acknowledge this thought and then replace it with something
like, "I’m sorry that I said that to Tom. I know that his
comments were harsh, but next time I will take a deep breath and
count to 5 before I respond to his criticism. I’m going to
learn to handle these types of exchanges better."
After completing this internal thought transition, put a quarter
in a jar. After a week or two of doing this, use that money to
reward yourself for improving your internal thoughts!
2. The Rubber Band
Put a loose rubber band around one of your wrists. Each time
that you think a negative thought, snap the rubber band. This
will immediately switch your negative thought to the physical
sensation that you feel on your wrist. You don’t have to
snap it very hard to have this work…it’s a gentle reminder
that you don’t want to focus on those negative thoughts any
longer.
3. STOP!
Each time that you are aware that you are thinking something
negative, yell, "STOP!" Ideally, you yell this out loud, but
only if you’re in a private place where others aren’t likely to
hear you…it probably wouldn’t be a good idea to be sitting on
the Commuter Rail yelling, "STOP!"…if you know what I mean…
You can also yell, "STOP!" in your thoughts to literally cause
to you stop the negative thought. Either way, the purpose
is for you to actually stop thinking the negative thought.
Initially, after you yell, "STOP!" you’ll probably think
something like, "This is silly" or, "Does this really work?",
which is perfect because it caused you to focus on something
other than your negative thought!
After using one of the negative thought chasers for a couple of
weeks notice how you’re feeling about yourself, others and even
life in general. It may surprise you what a BIG difference
paying attention to your internal thoughts can have on your life…
This quote from Henry Ford sums up this topic very nicely…
"Whether you think you can, or if you think you can’t, you’re right!"
*************************************************************
What’s Next for You?
*************************************************************
This month I’d love to see you become more aware of the thoughts
you have. Notice how often you have positive thoughts and focus
on them. If you notice some negative thought creeping in, try
one of the three ideas listed in the feature article to chase
them away.
After ridding yourself of some of those negative thoughts for a
couple of days, notice how you feel about yourself. Do you feel
more content? Do you feel less anxious? Maybe you’ll feel a bit
less angry with yourself…
This can be a difficult process to do and isn’t one that will
happen overnight, so please don’t let this just be one more
thing to beat yourself up over… Be sure to reward yourself for
any thoughts that you successfully transform or eliminate!
Do you have a different way to chase away negative thoughts? Pleasesend an e-mail to mailto:Helen@BetterThanEverCoaching.com with a
brief description and I’ll include it in a future issue of ‘What Could Be
Better’. Please let me know if you’d like to remain anonymous.
*************************************************************
Resources
*************************************************************
-- Articles --
"If Thoughts Create…" by Oliver Guttorm
http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/Guttorm2.html
"The Power of Thought" by Robert Taylor
http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/Taylor36.html
"You’re Right!" by Miles W. Miller
http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/Miller27.html
-- Books --
As a Man Thinketh by James Allen
The Secret by Rhonda Byrne
What to Say When You Talk to Your Self by Dr. Shad Helmstetter
-- Website --
http://209.216.4.7/cgi/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=1;t=000235
‘Selfgrowth.com Discussion Board: Thoughts are things’
-- CD --
Powerful Self-Talk, Change Your Self-Talk, Change Your Life
by Michael J. Russ
-- DVD --
The Secret by Rhonda Byrne
Note: Mention of any of the above resources does not
indicate endorsement.
*************************************************************
Reader’s Corner
*************************************************************
In my last newsletter, I asked readers to share your declutter
adventures…here’s what happened when Suzette cleaned out a
closet…
"Ben and I had been saying how desperately we needed to clean
out our closet in our bedroom. We just kept putting it off.
Our closet became a collection area of unpaired socks, out of
style clothes and a multitude of other things. The shelves were
full and messy, clothes outdated and summer stuff still in the
closet.
Determined to get it done. I first pulled everything off the
shelves. And I mean everything. The pile in the middle
of the floor was huge. I had two trash bags (the 55 gallon
kind…), one for the women's shelter and one for garbage. The
two bags quickly became four.
The process took hours. But finally the pile was gone, the bed
as cleaned off and the shoes were organized. I could see the
floor!
It was nice to see a clean closet. Now, I enjoy picking out my
clothes and keeping it neat every day, just remembering how much
work it took makes sure of that!
I took the bags to the women's shelter and thought, "Good that's
done!".
Yesterday, I received a thank you note from the women's shelter
thanking me for my donation and telling me how I was helping
women and children of domestic violence have a new start and
developing their independence. It was definitely a great
experience cleaning out the closet for us and for numerous other
women!"
-- Suzette Nicholas
Wow! What a wonderful feeling to help others in need just
by cleaning out your closet! That’s terrific! Thanks for
sharing your declutter adventure with us, Suzette.
A former colleague of mine describes a process that he uses to
make sure that he is clutter-free! Here it is…
"I hate clutter!
I have a monthly routine at work where I go thru my e-mail
folders (and regular folders) for a cleanup. What is great
about the process is not so much the elimination of old files,
but stuff I filed and forgot about that triggers some tasks,
etc. that I need to do. One thing my management has always said
about me is that I am on top of everything. I think it’s
because I don’t have clutter or 100’s of files that sit there
and are never reviewed."
What a great process to stay on top of EVERYTHING and keep
clutter-free! Thanks for sharing that with us.
Do you have a decluttering adventure or a clutter-reducing tip
that you are willing to share with us? Please send an e-mail to
mailto:Helen@BetterThanEverCoaching.com with a brief description
of your favorite way to celebrate. Please let me know if you’d
prefer to remain anonymous.
*************************************************************
Thank you for subscribing to this newsletter. It is published
every month, except for a combined issue in November/December
and July/August. To cancel or change your subscription, please
refer to the link at the very bottom of this newsletter.
Do you know someone who would enjoy this newsletter? Please
send the entire issue intact and unaltered to them! Thank you!
To subscribe to this free newsletter, please send a blank e-mail
to mailto:Helen20-192607@autocontactor.com. When you receive
the confirmation e-mail, please follow the instructions to
complete your subscription. As a special Thank You for
subscribing, you will receive Three FREE Success Journal Secrets
to Creating a Better Life!
Your privacy is important to me. I do not give out or sell my
subscriber list to anyone.
Please send any questions, comments or insights to me at:
mailto:Helen@BetterThanEverCoaching.com or P.O. Box 391,
Brewster, MA 02631. Or you can give me a call toll-free at:
(888) 294-5779.
Be sure to visit my website at:
http://www.BetterThanEverCoaching.com for more information.
*************************************************************
Better Than Ever Coaching
Partnering with Professionals to
Confidently Navigate Change
*************************************************************
Copyright © 2007 Better Than Ever Coaching.
All rights reserved.
*************************************************************
What Could Be Better?
Written by Helen F. Kosinski, ACC - Professional Coach
February 2007: Volume 2, Issue 2 / ISSN # 1935-4827
*************************************************************
This Month: A Quarter for Your Thoughts
- Feature Article
- What’s Next for You?
- Resources
- Reader’s Corner
*************************************************************
Hi,
I’ve often wondered what animals think about. I’ll see my dog,
Makena, sitting in the living room and wonder if she’s thinking
about when she’ll get her dinner or when she’s going to get to
go for a walk… Or, I’ll see Hana, my female cat, curled up
comfy and cozy, except her tail is twitching…is she thinking
about how she’s going to get back at Kona, her brother?
What do you spend most of your time thinking about? Today’s
feature article focuses on the importance of thinking about what
you really want to invite into your life. Your thoughts spell
out your wishes…so, as the old saying goes "Be careful what you
wish for", or maybe it’s more accurate to say, "Choose your
thoughts wisely".
I hope all of your thoughts bring you closer to your Better Than
Ever Life!
Have a wonderful month!
All my best,
Helen
P.S. Have you heard the hubbub about **The Secret**? This DVD
was released almost a year ago (March 2006) and since that time,
more and more people are learning **The Secret**. As a matter
of fact, Oprah has had two show in February about **The
Secret**…here are the links to the write-ups about these shows:
http://www2.oprah.com/tows/pastshows/200702/tows_past_20070208.
jhtml and http://www2.oprah.
com/spiritself/slide/20070216/ss_20070216_284_101.jhtml
So…what’s **The Secret**? Basically, it boils down to the fact
that each one of us has the ability to create the life that we
have always wanted…and your thoughts play a huge role in that
process. Check it out…http://www.thesecret.tv.
*************************************************************
Feature Article: A Quarter for Your Thoughts
*************************************************************
Here’s a riddle for you…
I can make you rise or fall.
I can work for you, I can work against you.
I can make you a success or a failure;
I control the way you feel, the way you act;
I can make you laugh, I can make you love.
I can make your heart sing with joy and excitement, or
I can make you sad and dejected;
I can make you sick,
I can make you feel like you're shackled and heavy
and bound, or
I can make you feel like a prism's hue, bright and dancing
and beautiful,
I can never be removed, only replaced.
Who am I?
What am I?
I am thought.
- Author Unknown
It’s amazing to me that a simple thought could potentially have
such a big impact. And, if that’s not enough to make an
impression on you, add the fact that each one of us has
thousands and thousands of thoughts in any given day.
A few years ago, I remember participating in a conversation with
two colleagues who were discussing the fact that they were
getting better at not beating themselves up with their thoughts.
They were saying how difficult it was for them to be kind to
themselves when they would do or say something that they felt
wasn’t the correct thing to do or say. Does this happen to you?
Are you even aware that you do it? Since that conversation,
I’ve become much more aware of my internal thoughts and what I
say to myself. I catch myself thinking things like ‘WHY did you
do THAT?’ or ‘Nice job, that report took forever, but it’s
finally done!’ or ‘I can’t believe I just said that to him…’ or
‘Wow, you got all that done today…good for you!’.
What are you thinking about? Do your thoughts focus on things
that are:
 | important? | |
| trivial? | |
| positive? | |
| negative? | |
| loving? | |
| fearful? | |
| limiting? |
impact on your life. So…if you’re regularly telling
yourself positive uplifting and encouraging things, then you’re
probably pretty happy with the way your life is progressing.
However, what if you’re constantly telling yourself that you’re
doing things incorrectly, or that you’re not good enough, or
that you’re stupid? What impact do you think that’s going to
have on your self-esteem, and ultimately, on your life?
What can you do if you discover that your thoughts aren’t as
positive as you’d like them to be? Here are three ideas that
may help chase those negative unproductive thoughts away:
1. A Quarter for Your Thoughts
Each time that you recognize that you’re having a negative
thought, stop and take a quick second to acknowledge this
thought. Then, replace it with a more positive thought.
For example, if you just said something in a meeting that you
wished you hadn’t, instead of thinking, "I’m so stupid! Why did
I just say that? He was being so nasty with his comments, I
just had to respond, but I can’t believe that I said THAT… Now
there’s no way that I’ll get that promotion."
Acknowledge this thought and then replace it with something
like, "I’m sorry that I said that to Tom. I know that his
comments were harsh, but next time I will take a deep breath and
count to 5 before I respond to his criticism. I’m going to
learn to handle these types of exchanges better."
After completing this internal thought transition, put a quarter
in a jar. After a week or two of doing this, use that money to
reward yourself for improving your internal thoughts!
2. The Rubber Band
Put a loose rubber band around one of your wrists. Each time
that you think a negative thought, snap the rubber band. This
will immediately switch your negative thought to the physical
sensation that you feel on your wrist. You don’t have to
snap it very hard to have this work…it’s a gentle reminder
that you don’t want to focus on those negative thoughts any
longer.
3. STOP!
Each time that you are aware that you are thinking something
negative, yell, "STOP!" Ideally, you yell this out loud, but
only if you’re in a private place where others aren’t likely to
hear you…it probably wouldn’t be a good idea to be sitting on
the Commuter Rail yelling, "STOP!"…if you know what I mean…
You can also yell, "STOP!" in your thoughts to literally cause
to you stop the negative thought. Either way, the purpose
is for you to actually stop thinking the negative thought.
Initially, after you yell, "STOP!" you’ll probably think
something like, "This is silly" or, "Does this really work?",
which is perfect because it caused you to focus on something
other than your negative thought!
After using one of the negative thought chasers for a couple of
weeks notice how you’re feeling about yourself, others and even
life in general. It may surprise you what a BIG difference
paying attention to your internal thoughts can have on your life…
This quote from Henry Ford sums up this topic very nicely…
"Whether you think you can, or if you think you can’t, you’re right!"
*************************************************************
What’s Next for You?
*************************************************************
This month I’d love to see you become more aware of the thoughts
you have. Notice how often you have positive thoughts and focus
on them. If you notice some negative thought creeping in, try
one of the three ideas listed in the feature article to chase
them away.
After ridding yourself of some of those negative thoughts for a
couple of days, notice how you feel about yourself. Do you feel
more content? Do you feel less anxious? Maybe you’ll feel a bit
less angry with yourself…
This can be a difficult process to do and isn’t one that will
happen overnight, so please don’t let this just be one more
thing to beat yourself up over… Be sure to reward yourself for
any thoughts that you successfully transform or eliminate!
Do you have a different way to chase away negative thoughts? Please
brief description and I’ll include it in a future issue of ‘What Could Be
Better’. Please let me know if you’d like to remain anonymous.
*************************************************************
Resources
*************************************************************
-- Articles --
"If Thoughts Create…" by Oliver Guttorm
http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/Guttorm2.html
"The Power of Thought" by Robert Taylor
http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/Taylor36.html
"You’re Right!" by Miles W. Miller
http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/Miller27.html
-- Books --
As a Man Thinketh by James Allen
The Secret by Rhonda Byrne
What to Say When You Talk to Your Self by Dr. Shad Helmstetter
-- Website --
http://209.216.4.7/cgi/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=1;t=000235
‘Selfgrowth.com Discussion Board: Thoughts are things’
-- CD --
Powerful Self-Talk, Change Your Self-Talk, Change Your Life
by Michael J. Russ
-- DVD --
The Secret by Rhonda Byrne
Note: Mention of any of the above resources does not
indicate endorsement.
*************************************************************
Reader’s Corner
*************************************************************
In my last newsletter, I asked readers to share your declutter
adventures…here’s what happened when Suzette cleaned out a
closet…
"Ben and I had been saying how desperately we needed to clean
out our closet in our bedroom. We just kept putting it off.
Our closet became a collection area of unpaired socks, out of
style clothes and a multitude of other things. The shelves were
full and messy, clothes outdated and summer stuff still in the
closet.
Determined to get it done. I first pulled everything off the
shelves. And I mean everything. The pile in the middle
of the floor was huge. I had two trash bags (the 55 gallon
kind…), one for the women's shelter and one for garbage. The
two bags quickly became four.
The process took hours. But finally the pile was gone, the bed
as cleaned off and the shoes were organized. I could see the
floor!
It was nice to see a clean closet. Now, I enjoy picking out my
clothes and keeping it neat every day, just remembering how much
work it took makes sure of that!
I took the bags to the women's shelter and thought, "Good that's
done!".
Yesterday, I received a thank you note from the women's shelter
thanking me for my donation and telling me how I was helping
women and children of domestic violence have a new start and
developing their independence. It was definitely a great
experience cleaning out the closet for us and for numerous other
women!"
-- Suzette Nicholas
Wow! What a wonderful feeling to help others in need just
by cleaning out your closet! That’s terrific! Thanks for
sharing your declutter adventure with us, Suzette.
A former colleague of mine describes a process that he uses to
make sure that he is clutter-free! Here it is…
"I hate clutter!
I have a monthly routine at work where I go thru my e-mail
folders (and regular folders) for a cleanup. What is great
about the process is not so much the elimination of old files,
but stuff I filed and forgot about that triggers some tasks,
etc. that I need to do. One thing my management has always said
about me is that I am on top of everything. I think it’s
because I don’t have clutter or 100’s of files that sit there
and are never reviewed."
What a great process to stay on top of EVERYTHING and keep
clutter-free! Thanks for sharing that with us.
Do you have a decluttering adventure or a clutter-reducing tip
that you are willing to share with us? Please send an e-mail to
mailto:Helen@BetterThanEverCoaching.com with a brief description
of your favorite way to celebrate. Please let me know if you’d
prefer to remain anonymous.
*************************************************************
Thank you for subscribing to this newsletter. It is published
every month, except for a combined issue in November/December
and July/August. To cancel or change your subscription, please
refer to the link at the very bottom of this newsletter.
Do you know someone who would enjoy this newsletter? Please
send the entire issue intact and unaltered to them! Thank you!
To subscribe to this free newsletter, please send a blank e-mail
to mailto:Helen20-192607@autocontactor.com. When you receive
the confirmation e-mail, please follow the instructions to
complete your subscription. As a special Thank You for
subscribing, you will receive Three FREE Success Journal Secrets
to Creating a Better Life!
Your privacy is important to me. I do not give out or sell my
subscriber list to anyone.
Please send any questions, comments or insights to me at:
mailto:Helen@BetterThanEverCoaching.com or P.O. Box 391,
Brewster, MA 02631. Or you can give me a call toll-free at:
(888) 294-5779.
Be sure to visit my website at:
http://www.BetterThanEverCoaching.com for more information.
*************************************************************
Better Than Ever Coaching
Partnering with Professionals to
Confidently Navigate Change
*************************************************************
Copyright © 2007 Better Than Ever Coaching.
All rights reserved.
*************************************************************
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