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Newsletters - September 2007
| Better Than Ever Coaching |
| Receive Three Free Success Journal Secrets to Creating a Better Life... Sign up today and you will also receive my monthly newsletter, What Could Be Better? |
| Privacy Policy: I will never sell, rent or share my subscriber list with anyone. |
What Could Be Better?
Written by:
Helen F. Kosinski, ACC, MBA - Professional Coach
September 2007: Volume 2, Issue 9 / ISSN # 1935-4827
*************************************************************
This Month: The 3 Rs…it is not what you think!
- Feature Article
- What's Next for You?
- Resources
- From Our Readers
*****************************************************
Hi,
Happy September! I hope you enjoyed your summer. I can’t tell you
how many people have commented on how FAST this past summer
went. I have to agree with them, it sure flew by!
You’ll never guess what I did this summer… In July, I graduated from the
Advanced Coach Training program offered by Coach U! I really enjoyed
the program. They offered a wide variety of classes that really helped to
prepare me to be a well rounded, experienced coach. I feel fortunate to
have had knowledgeable instructors and very engaged classmates, who
made going through this process interesting, challenging and fun.
Can you believe it’s been one year since I wrote the first issue of this
newsletter? I sure can’t! I’ve really enjoyed writing to you each month. I
would like to thank you for your continued interest and to say how
happy I am that so many of you have contacted me with your wonderful
feedback, stories and successes. I’d like to take this opportunity to
invite you to send me an e-mail (mailto:Helen@BetterThanEverCoaching.
com) to let me know how I’m doing. It would be very helpful to receive
your thoughts.
I hope you find today’s topic ‘The 3 Rs’ valuable. What do you think these
3 Rs relate to? It probably isn’t what you think… I’d love to hear what
impact these 3 Rs have in your life.
Have a Better Than Ever month!
All my best,
Helen
*************************************************************
Feature Article: The 3 Rs…it is not what you think!
*************************************************************
Quick! What do you think of when you read – ‘The 3 Rs’? Some folks will
automatically think of ‘Reading, Writing and ‘Rithmatic’, especially
around this time of year. I guess you’d call those the 3 Rs of Education
or Schooling.
But, this newsletter isn’t about THOSE 3 Rs. It’s about the 3 Rs of
Confidence.
When you think of someone who has confidence, what attributes stand
out for you? I picture someone who is knowledgeable, appropriately
enthusiastic, comfortable in his/her own skin and eager to listen to
others, yet willing to share what he/she knows. When the person’s
confidence is genuine, there is a charisma that just naturally draws other
people to this person. Would you like to embody the characteristics of a
confident person? The following 3 Rs will get you headed in the right
direction:
1. Reframe
It’s important to realize we create our own level of confidence, and on the
flip-side, we can create our lack of confidence. We each have the power
to reframe our self perceptions with regards to our self-confidence. To
be truthful, it all goes back to what we tell ourselves and what we choose
to believe about ourselves in any given situation.
Here’s an example. Suppose I’m going on a job interview which
requires in-depth knowledge about project management. I haven’t
managed any projects for well over a year, but prior to that I had 15+
years of solid project management experience. Do you think I’ll be
confident in this interview? Well, if I tell myself that I must be crazy to be
going on this interview because I’ve been out touch for such a long time
and everything in project management has probably changed, I suspect I
won’t be very confident. However, if I tell myself that:
I know I’ll have the confidence in the interview to be a viable candidate forthe job! Can you hear the difference in what I am telling myself in each of
these scenarios?
Now, it’s your turn. Is there a situation where you are not as confident as
you would like to be? What shift can you make right now in your thinking
to give yourself a confidence boost? How can you focus on the value
that you bring to this situation, instead of what you think you don’t have?
What things are you telling yourself that are not based in facts? What
facts could you add to your thoughts to increase your confidence?
2. Rekindle
When we’re not at our best confidence level, it can be helpful to rekindle
our confidence. You’re probably asking, ‘What does that mean?’ All of
us have a time in our past when we felt confident. Rekindle means to go
back to one of those confident times, examine it and use the information
you gather to gain the confidence you desire in your current situation.
Here’s how it works. Think about a time when you were very confident.
Picture it as vividly as you can. Sometimes writing down key points about
the situation can be helpful.
Once you have a crystal clear picture of this confident time, start the
examination by asking yourself a few questions, like ‘What made me so
confident?’, ‘Who was I being when I was so confident?’ or ‘What was
the benefit of my confidence?’.
Now, think about the difference between the time you were confident and
your current situation. Think about your responses in the previous
paragraph and determine how you can relate them to your current
situation. For example, what’s different between these two situations?
What specific steps can I take to make these two situations more
similar?
3. Role Model
Often it helps to have a role model who demonstrates your desired level
of confidence. Can you think of someone (you don’t have to know them
personally) who you have observed that has confidence? What
specifically did he/she do, say, etc.? Be as specific as you can be as you
think about this person. Then, think about what changes you can
comfortably make to more closely resemble his/her confident style.
Remember, you are not trying to ‘be this person’. You are using him/her
as a confidence role model’
Confidence is a great feeling. Things just seem to flow when one has
confidence. It really can make all the difference in the world!
*************************************************************
What’s Next for You?
*************************************************************
Before you get started on your own experiment with the 3Rs of
Confidence, it’s important to note that there’s no order to this process
(e.g., you can do Rekindle, Reframe and then Role Model) and you may
find that you don’t need to do all three of these to meet your desired
confidence level.
Are you ready to try out the 3 Rs of Confidence? Terrific!
Think of a situation in which you would like to be more confident. Now,
pick the ‘R’ – Reframe, Rekindle or Role Model – that feels right to you.
Once you’ve followed the suggestion for the ‘R’, reassess your
confidence level. Is it where you’d like it to be? If so, you’re done! If not,
pick a different ‘R’ and follow those suggestions. Go through the ‘Rs’
until you feel that your confidence level has reached the level you’d like it
to be.
We would love to hear your success with the 3 Rs! Please send an e-
mail to mailto:Helen@BetterThanEverCoaching.com with a brief
description and I’ll include it in a future issue of ‘What Could Be Better’.
Please let me know if you’d like to remain anonymous.
*************************************************************
Resources
*************************************************************
-- Articles --
Choosing Confidence by Steve Goodier
http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/Choosing_Confidence.html
Create Your Own Ultimate Self Confidence by Mohammen Magdy
http://ezinearticles.com/?Create-Your-Own-Ultimate-Self-
Confidence&id=346651
Paradigm of Confidence by Samia Aleem
http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/Aleem2.html
Seven Easy Ways to Build Unshakeable Confidence by Kevin Sinclair
http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/Sinclair9.html
Tips on Building Self Confidence by Tim Austin
http://ezinearticles.com/?Tips-on-Building-Self-Confidence&id=339944
-- Books --
Confidence by Rosabeth Moss Kanter
The Confidence Plan by Tim Ursiny
What’s Holding You Back? by Sam Horn
Note: Mention of any of the above resources does not
indicate endorsement.
*************************************************************
From Our Readers
*************************************************************
Tim Hodder, a Software Consultant, contacted me with the following
suggestion for making his summer vacation last!
‘I've spread out my vacation over the whole summer -- I work 4-day work
weeks. The fifth day is a vacation day, so I'm still treated as full-time. It is
nice because I'll take the one day off to do some biking on less crowded
trails or golfing without feeling rushed. There's still the option of doing
nothing -- sitting poolside chatting to any other neighbors that are not
working that day.
To me taking a day off a week keeps me relaxed over the whole
summer. I work less (very good thing), and if I get sick I know I still have
a vacation day the following week to enjoy.’
Tim also suggested the following resource:
*************************************************************
Working on the 3 Rs of Confidence can catapult you forward! Why not
set up a complimentary meeting with me to find out how coaching can
help you to confidently move forward? Please contact me at
mailto:Helen@BetterThanEverCoaching.com to setup a
time to meet over the phone or in-person.
Thank you for subscribing to my newsletter. It is published
every month, except for a combined issue in November/December
and July/August. To cancel or change your subscription, please
refer to the link at the very bottom of this newsletter.
Do you know someone who would enjoy this newsletter? Please
send the entire issue intact and unaltered to them! Thank you!
To subscribe to this free newsletter, please send a blank e-mail
to mailto:Helen20-192607@autocontactor.com. When you receive
the confirmation e-mail, please follow the instructions to
complete your subscription. As a special Thank You for
subscribing, you will receive Three FREE Success Journal Secrets
to Creating a Better Life!
Your privacy is important to me. I do not give out or sell my
subscriber list to anyone.
Please send any questions, comments or insights to me at:
mailto:Helen@BetterThanEverCoaching.com or P.O. Box 391,
Brewster, MA 02631. Or you can give me a call toll-free at:
(888) 294-5779.
Be sure to visit my website at:
http://www.BetterThanEverCoaching.com for more information.
*************************************************************
Better Than Ever Coaching
Partnering with Professionals to
Confidently Navigate Change
*************************************************************
Copyright © 2007 Better Than Ever Coaching, LLC.
All rights reserved.
*************************************************************
Written by:
Helen F. Kosinski, ACC, MBA - Professional Coach
September 2007: Volume 2, Issue 9 / ISSN # 1935-4827
*************************************************************
This Month: The 3 Rs…it is not what you think!
- Feature Article
- What's Next for You?
- Resources
- From Our Readers
*****************************************************
Hi,
Happy September! I hope you enjoyed your summer. I can’t tell you
how many people have commented on how FAST this past summer
went. I have to agree with them, it sure flew by!
You’ll never guess what I did this summer… In July, I graduated from the
Advanced Coach Training program offered by Coach U! I really enjoyed
the program. They offered a wide variety of classes that really helped to
prepare me to be a well rounded, experienced coach. I feel fortunate to
have had knowledgeable instructors and very engaged classmates, who
made going through this process interesting, challenging and fun.
Can you believe it’s been one year since I wrote the first issue of this
newsletter? I sure can’t! I’ve really enjoyed writing to you each month. I
would like to thank you for your continued interest and to say how
happy I am that so many of you have contacted me with your wonderful
feedback, stories and successes. I’d like to take this opportunity to
invite you to send me an e-mail (mailto:Helen@BetterThanEverCoaching.
com) to let me know how I’m doing. It would be very helpful to receive
your thoughts.
I hope you find today’s topic ‘The 3 Rs’ valuable. What do you think these
3 Rs relate to? It probably isn’t what you think… I’d love to hear what
impact these 3 Rs have in your life.
Have a Better Than Ever month!
All my best,
Helen
*************************************************************
Feature Article: The 3 Rs…it is not what you think!
*************************************************************
Quick! What do you think of when you read – ‘The 3 Rs’? Some folks will
automatically think of ‘Reading, Writing and ‘Rithmatic’, especially
around this time of year. I guess you’d call those the 3 Rs of Education
or Schooling.
But, this newsletter isn’t about THOSE 3 Rs. It’s about the 3 Rs of
Confidence.
When you think of someone who has confidence, what attributes stand
out for you? I picture someone who is knowledgeable, appropriately
enthusiastic, comfortable in his/her own skin and eager to listen to
others, yet willing to share what he/she knows. When the person’s
confidence is genuine, there is a charisma that just naturally draws other
people to this person. Would you like to embody the characteristics of a
confident person? The following 3 Rs will get you headed in the right
direction:
1. Reframe
It’s important to realize we create our own level of confidence, and on the
flip-side, we can create our lack of confidence. We each have the power
to reframe our self perceptions with regards to our self-confidence. To
be truthful, it all goes back to what we tell ourselves and what we choose
to believe about ourselves in any given situation.
Here’s an example. Suppose I’m going on a job interview which
requires in-depth knowledge about project management. I haven’t
managed any projects for well over a year, but prior to that I had 15+
years of solid project management experience. Do you think I’ll be
confident in this interview? Well, if I tell myself that I must be crazy to be
going on this interview because I’ve been out touch for such a long time
and everything in project management has probably changed, I suspect I
won’t be very confident. However, if I tell myself that:
 | I was an expert in project management | |
| I still use many of the techniques in my everyday life | |
| I love managing projects because I get to see things completed |
I know I’ll have the confidence in the interview to be a viable candidate for
these scenarios?
Now, it’s your turn. Is there a situation where you are not as confident as
you would like to be? What shift can you make right now in your thinking
to give yourself a confidence boost? How can you focus on the value
that you bring to this situation, instead of what you think you don’t have?
What things are you telling yourself that are not based in facts? What
facts could you add to your thoughts to increase your confidence?
2. Rekindle
When we’re not at our best confidence level, it can be helpful to rekindle
our confidence. You’re probably asking, ‘What does that mean?’ All of
us have a time in our past when we felt confident. Rekindle means to go
back to one of those confident times, examine it and use the information
you gather to gain the confidence you desire in your current situation.
Here’s how it works. Think about a time when you were very confident.
Picture it as vividly as you can. Sometimes writing down key points about
the situation can be helpful.
Once you have a crystal clear picture of this confident time, start the
examination by asking yourself a few questions, like ‘What made me so
confident?’, ‘Who was I being when I was so confident?’ or ‘What was
the benefit of my confidence?’.
Now, think about the difference between the time you were confident and
your current situation. Think about your responses in the previous
paragraph and determine how you can relate them to your current
situation. For example, what’s different between these two situations?
What specific steps can I take to make these two situations more
similar?
3. Role Model
Often it helps to have a role model who demonstrates your desired level
of confidence. Can you think of someone (you don’t have to know them
personally) who you have observed that has confidence? What
specifically did he/she do, say, etc.? Be as specific as you can be as you
think about this person. Then, think about what changes you can
comfortably make to more closely resemble his/her confident style.
Remember, you are not trying to ‘be this person’. You are using him/her
as a confidence role model’
Confidence is a great feeling. Things just seem to flow when one has
confidence. It really can make all the difference in the world!
*************************************************************
What’s Next for You?
*************************************************************
Before you get started on your own experiment with the 3Rs of
Confidence, it’s important to note that there’s no order to this process
(e.g., you can do Rekindle, Reframe and then Role Model) and you may
find that you don’t need to do all three of these to meet your desired
confidence level.
Are you ready to try out the 3 Rs of Confidence? Terrific!
Think of a situation in which you would like to be more confident. Now,
pick the ‘R’ – Reframe, Rekindle or Role Model – that feels right to you.
Once you’ve followed the suggestion for the ‘R’, reassess your
confidence level. Is it where you’d like it to be? If so, you’re done! If not,
pick a different ‘R’ and follow those suggestions. Go through the ‘Rs’
until you feel that your confidence level has reached the level you’d like it
to be.
We would love to hear your success with the 3 Rs! Please send an e-
mail to mailto:Helen@BetterThanEverCoaching.com with a brief
description and I’ll include it in a future issue of ‘What Could Be Better’.
Please let me know if you’d like to remain anonymous.
*************************************************************
Resources
*************************************************************
-- Articles --
Choosing Confidence by Steve Goodier
http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/Choosing_Confidence.html
Create Your Own Ultimate Self Confidence by Mohammen Magdy
http://ezinearticles.com/?Create-Your-Own-Ultimate-Self-
Confidence&id=346651
Paradigm of Confidence by Samia Aleem
http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/Aleem2.html
Seven Easy Ways to Build Unshakeable Confidence by Kevin Sinclair
http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/Sinclair9.html
Tips on Building Self Confidence by Tim Austin
http://ezinearticles.com/?Tips-on-Building-Self-Confidence&id=339944
-- Books --
Confidence by Rosabeth Moss Kanter
The Confidence Plan by Tim Ursiny
What’s Holding You Back? by Sam Horn
Note: Mention of any of the above resources does not
indicate endorsement.
*************************************************************
From Our Readers
*************************************************************
Tim Hodder, a Software Consultant, contacted me with the following
suggestion for making his summer vacation last!
‘I've spread out my vacation over the whole summer -- I work 4-day work
weeks. The fifth day is a vacation day, so I'm still treated as full-time. It is
nice because I'll take the one day off to do some biking on less crowded
trails or golfing without feeling rushed. There's still the option of doing
nothing -- sitting poolside chatting to any other neighbors that are not
working that day.
To me taking a day off a week keeps me relaxed over the whole
summer. I work less (very good thing), and if I get sick I know I still have
a vacation day the following week to enjoy.’
Tim also suggested the following resource:
| Turn It Off: How to Unplug from the Anytime-Anywhere Office | |
| Without Disconnecting Your Career (Paperback) by Gil Gordon |
*************************************************************
Working on the 3 Rs of Confidence can catapult you forward! Why not
set up a complimentary meeting with me to find out how coaching can
help you to confidently move forward? Please contact me at
mailto:Helen@BetterThanEverCoaching.com to setup a
time to meet over the phone or in-person.
Thank you for subscribing to my newsletter. It is published
every month, except for a combined issue in November/December
and July/August. To cancel or change your subscription, please
refer to the link at the very bottom of this newsletter.
Do you know someone who would enjoy this newsletter? Please
send the entire issue intact and unaltered to them! Thank you!
To subscribe to this free newsletter, please send a blank e-mail
to mailto:Helen20-192607@autocontactor.com. When you receive
the confirmation e-mail, please follow the instructions to
complete your subscription. As a special Thank You for
subscribing, you will receive Three FREE Success Journal Secrets
to Creating a Better Life!
Your privacy is important to me. I do not give out or sell my
subscriber list to anyone.
Please send any questions, comments or insights to me at:
mailto:Helen@BetterThanEverCoaching.com or P.O. Box 391,
Brewster, MA 02631. Or you can give me a call toll-free at:
(888) 294-5779.
Be sure to visit my website at:
http://www.BetterThanEverCoaching.com for more information.
*************************************************************
Better Than Ever Coaching
Partnering with Professionals to
Confidently Navigate Change
*************************************************************
Copyright © 2007 Better Than Ever Coaching, LLC.
All rights reserved.
*************************************************************
| | Home | Coaching | Retreats | Programs | Products | Newsletters | | Pictures | Resources | FAQ | Testimonials | About Helen | | Contact Helen | Copyright © 2005 - 2012 Better Than Ever Coaching, LLC. All rights reserved. Address: P.O. Box 391, Brewster, MA 02631 Telephone: (508) 896-5779 Click here to Contact Helen |